Hindsight & Letting Go of Outcomes
It is easy to see in hindsight how the events in life led us to where we are today. That’s the logical way to look at life’s progression. Yes, hindsight is 20-20, if you’re willing to look objectively.
I can see how being a scientist, earning a PhD, learning business development in biosciences, business consulting, editing a book, writing marketing copy for menswear catalogs, being a marketing copywriter for a scientific publishing company, and spending a lot of time and energy on personal and spiritual development throughout these career phases, beginning around age 10 or 12, not only led me where to where I am today, but served specific roles in building a multifaceted matrix/foundation of knowledge, experience and knowhow upon which I can securely stand wherever life takes me.
- Can you see how the steps in your life have brought you to this point?
- Are there things you have learned that you only see how they have contributed to your current success or capabilities?
For me, the analytical, writing, editing, business and marketing skills allow my left brain to feel more comfortable while my right brain allows the creative flow of the unknown to channel through me from my higher self. I don’t worry that I won’t be able to explain something or that the words won’t be clear. That is a gift of the preparation that I unknowingly gave myself. The time spent learning how to build a website and then creating my website and social media accounts also supports my endeavors.
I can see how all the steps fit together. Many of those were larger events, and I certainly felt stress in the decision-making.
But what about all the small decisions and opportunities that come up? Every small step we take also contributes to our life’s journey. We often tend to stress about those as well. “Is this a good idea?” “Should I call?” “Should I accept the invitation?” “What if I do it?” “What if I don’t do it?” “Will it get the right response?” “Should I just avoid possible negative outcomes?” “I don’t want to be thrown off my path.” “How does that fit in with my dharma?” So much to worry about!
A New Form of Foresight
So, instead of over-analyzing and running scenarios in my head like a computer algorithm designed to predict outcomes, I have begun to simply allow for the possibility of right action in things that I can’t see the immediate fit in my life. I turn the lack of possible hindsight (the outcome hasn’t happened yet) into a form of foresight. Instead of blatantly rejecting the possibilities or opportunities, I take an action related to what has been put before me and let the Universe decide if it is a path to take now or not. If I send a request via email or submit my writing for publication, the outcome will show what the best result is. Who am I to decide what outcome is best? In this scenario, I’m a human thinking in the confines of finite brain matter. Although these actions may push some fear buttons, it’s a lot better than agonizing over trying to make a decision as to whether something is right or not before you take even one step.
Letting Go of Control
Why didn’t I think of that sooner? All that agonizing could have been prevented by just throwing it out there for the universe to handle. We often think we need to control everything and make the perfect decision for things to turn out “right.” Control, control, control. How exhausting is that! So much energy put out trying to control outcomes, when there is no way for us to conceive of the highest or grandest outcome possible. Our human minds will always put some sort of limitation on it, as we forget some detail of how infinite the possibilities really are.
Control Versus Flow
When was the last time you tried to control an outcome?
Did it work?
When was the last time you took action and then let the universe run with it?
How did that turn out for you?
It’s not about lying on the couch and seeing what happens. But it’s also not about crafting every step to create a specific (usually limited) outcome. Take an action step and while doing it, ask the universe to create what is for your highest and best. This not only removes the stress of decision making, it also releases you from attachment to an outcome. I call that a win-win!
Is Control Controlling You?
How much time do you spend controlling your actions so you can try to control outcomes?
There are many ways we do this:
- Do you plan what you will say to try to elicit a specific response from other people?
- Do you painstakingly plan your communications trying to guess what will get the best response?
- Do you hold off taking action because you can’t decide what would be best or what the outcome will be?
- Do you plan every action in order to control the result?
As Queen Elsa said in Frozen, “Let It Go”
I personally have spent a lot of time and energy on control tactics, knowingly and unknowingly. I am so grateful for this awareness, and I plan on having a lot more free-time in the future.
Use your knowledge base and be authentic in every communication and action, and the universe will take care of the rest. All you have to do is ask. And please remember this step—putting out the request to the Universe is key. You can do this through affirmation, prayer or a simple thought at the time you are taking action. The outcome is certain—to be for your highest good.
The Evolving Intuitive
Sarah Ann Sporn, Ph.D.